CHEMO: The Great Eggscape

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already feeling eggstremely maternal about my eggs.

Last Halloween, whilst my friends were out partying and kids in costume were stalking the streets, I lay in a hospital bed. The night before I had undergone an ovarian transposition, an operation that I talk about in the post that I wrote that night, which you can find here. I will be chatting a bit more about this operation and this part of my treatment over the coming weeks, but for now I will just give you the basics and keep it short and sweet.

One of the things that I did not mention when talking about the operation was that it means that I will now need IVF if I ever want children. Now, before chemotherapy begins and it has the chance to potentially destroy my eggs, rendering me infertile, I am starting injections which will allow me to have an egg harvest. Note that my chemo regime will not definitely cause me to
lose my fertility, indeed they are hopeful that it won’t at all, rather this will act as a precaution just in case it does.

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Don’t look so pleased with yourself, I’m tired of your and Ms Poppins’ sexual tuppence innuendos. And anyway, my tuppence is worth more than that crappy bag of birdseed.

Do not panic ladies and gentleman! This does not mean I am about to have kids. Funnily enough, I think I’ll wait a few more years, or at least until my treatment is finished. And until I am ready to push a little bundle of joy the size of a watermelon out of my vagina , or, if you are weird and this is what you prefer to call it, my tuppence (I am so sorry for typing that, it is what my mum calls it – forever ruining Mary Poppins’ song, “Feed the Birds, Tuppence (bleurgh) a Bag”).

Today I had yet another appointment in the reproductive health medicine department at UCLH and tonight I will be having my first of what feels like thousands of impending injections. The next few weeks are going to be madly intense with scans and blood tests on top of the ridiculous amount of appointments I already had.

I am writing this so that you know why if, in the coming weeks, I begin to post less and less. Either it is my busy cancer calendar or I am in prison/on the run, after murdering everyone within a five mile radius when, in the midst of a hormone induced rage, I found someone did something mildly frustrating.

Anyway, all in all, things are about to get crazy.

And hormonal.

Very, very hormonal.

Show me the chocolate.

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Me in my happy place.

About the Author

tumourhasit@gmail.com

7 Comments

allison semikin

It’s going to be an eggstremely busy few weeks for you but I am eggstatic that your doctors made this possible. Beth although I know how hard you have found a lot of your journey you have been managing it with such grace. Keep going honey, summer will soon be here and all of this will be behind you. Love you to the moon and back and all the way round and back again xxccc

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Bernie Redmond

Beth the best of luck with your treatment. God bless you. Love Terry/Bernie/Lucy XXX

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Naomi

I hope this stage is as a positive experience as the last in Jacksonville and all goes well. I’d say to “Polio Guy” keep clear of Beth for the next few weeks – don’t think she’ll be a force to be reckoned with at this point in time! 😆 Plenty of chocolate needed on this egg hunt!! Love Naomi xx

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Wendy Bamping

Hi Beth
This post made me chuckle about the tuppence!! It is so funny the lady part names we inflict on our kids, we all know what mine is so I won’t put it out there!!!
Good luck with all the injections and appointments Mum is keeping me posted daily and really hoping to see you soon. Lots of love xxx ps I’m coming over to eat some of your chocolate stash!! xx

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Bruce Paton

Beth, you are are very pretty young woman going through a very tough time. I have just returned from Jacksonville where my lovely wife NIkki spent 3 month having proton beam therapy for a clival chordoma. While i was there looking after her i saw a lot of babies and young children undergoing what must have been a very strange, stressful and frightening experience. They all tackled it bravely and without complaint. You are having a tough time but at least you know why.

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